“It’s not your fault… it’s not your fault… it’s not your fault.” In the stirring 1997 film Good Will Hunting featuring a fresh-faced Matt Damon and a dramatic Robin Williams, this exchange between a troubled but brilliant Boston youth (Damon) and a wounded healer therapist (Williams) becomes the breakthrough crescendo of the film. The moment underscores a profound and emotional discovery - the father wounds inflicted upon young Will Hunting as a boy were not his fault. He didn’t do anything to deserve to be beaten and abused by his father, but he had internalized a core belief that somehow, he was to blame. Only hearing these words repeated over and over by a loving and empathetic older man who had himself experienced the same trauma was Will able to finally be released from the torture chamber that had imprisoned him emotionally.

It is shocking for some men to learn that Jesus Christ had the most painful and powerful father wounds of all time. No one was closer to His Father than Jesus, and no man has been more deeply wounded by His father than Jesus. The prophet Isaiah describes this Father Wound saying, “But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by His wounds we are healed.” Isaiah 53:5. Imagine that a perfect son wounded by his father so that your father wounds could be healed. No one understand your father wounds better than Jesus and no one is more capable of bringing healing and hope to your father wounds.

The mighty warrior King David once wrote, “Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close.” Psalm 27:10. No matter what the relationship with your father or mother is (was) like, you can take comfort in knowing that God is a Father who will hold you close. In the previously mentioned scene from Good Will Hunting, when the fatherly Dr. Maguire (Williams) first spoke those words, “It’s not your fault,” Will lowered his head and said, “yeah, I know that.” Again, Dr. Maguire moved closer and said, “look at me son, it’s not your fault.” At first, hearing those words repeated over and over caused Will to become angry, and even push away Dr. Maguire, but the persistent, loving, message of truth from this father figure eventually broke through as Will found his healing in a father’s embrace. This is the invitation for every man who comes to the Heavenly Father. Don’t just nod your head at the message of the Gospel and say, “yeah, I know that.” Don’t get angry and push the Father away. Hear His voice, receive His love, and find healing in His arms.

Father /// Wound is a new IMPACT Cohort study for men who want to become healthy men thriving in their relationships. When a man is willing to acknowledge the hurt, experience the healing, and share the hope that comes from the Father /// Wound study, he will become a better husband, father, and leader. Step forward with courage here.